La Puma Negra (PL 8/ 10)

[MoonSimply]

Well, my first try, here goes nothing.

 

La Puma Negra

Power Level: 8/10 (150/150pp)

Unspent Power Points: 0

Trade-Offs: None

 

In Brief: A familiar curse courses through the veins of a young woman, fighting over control against the will of a feral puma.

Alternate Identity: Carmen Alvarez Arrache (Secret)

Birthplace: Aquadilla, Puerto Rico

Residence: Claremont Academy, Freedom City, USA

Occupation: Student

Affiliations: Claremont Academy

Family: None Living

 

Description:
Age: 16
Gender: Female
Ethnicity: Hispanic
Height: 5’8”
Weight: 171lbs
Eyes: Yellow
Hair: Black

 

A Feline humanoid young woman of black hair and lithe figure. She likes to keep her hair long and somewhat untamed in it’s look, her body covered in greyish black fur. Typically, La Puma Negra wears the normal school uniform, however opting for an older skirted version, going for the normal version of the outfit when training. A costume of her own is still in the works.

 

History: Born Carmen Alvarez Arrache in Aquadilla, Puerto Rico, abandoned at birth and given to the orphanage of Saint Philomena, a Catholic run institution. Growing up, she had looked outwardly normal and lived a somewhat normal life until the age of 12, where her blood families curse began to manifest, first with small personality changes. The preferring of meat products, growing out her hair, and a more feral like attitude. This would only get worse as months went on and Carmen retreated in panic after hurting a fellow orphan with claws that had begun to grow.

 

She had barricaded herself in her room, not letting any of the nuns of the orphanages in save for food and communion. If it wasn’t for intervention from the Claremont Academy, the young Carmen would have likely further closed herself, blaming her fate on an unknown sin that she was paying for, the nuns unable to provide the needed care that she needed during these traumatic times. By the age 15, Carmen would be accepted into the school, having received on grant additional support until she was capable of physically and mentally attending the school.

 

Time and therapy had helped her, but still certain aspects of her curse have pushed beyond her growing shy nature to one of a more feral like stance, making past roommates leave in utter terror after only a month residing with her. There was no reason to hold back, and she was free to do as she pleased without constraint or feeling of difference. Carmen states she has no part in each one’s leave and has liked the relative silence and time alone.

 

The name La Puma Negra was one that she had come up with herself early on with her time at Claremont, attributing it to her dark fur color and cat like appearance.

 

Personality & Motivation: Carmen displays outwards ferocious exterior and short-tempered nature, prone to bouts of boredom with an at times low attention span coming from the feline nature of the curse. When parts of her true personality emerge, it is often rather shy and introverted. These two personalities often clash with each other, becoming a contest of wills.

 

Carmen wants to confront and learn of what she is, to apply herself and potentially do some form of good. Her curse weighs heavily on her conscious due to her catholic upbringing, seeing it as a sin that she must repay in some service.

 

Powers & Tactics: The curse that Carmen has has altered her into a feline humanoid, resulting in abilities beyond that of a normal human being. Her senses are far enhanced, allowing her to see ultra-violet light and see in the dark. Hearing and smell has also been altered to an amazing degree. Her agility and natural strength have also increased dramatically, allowing her to far easily climb surfaces and to lift heavy objects.

 

In combat, Puma Negra uses hit and run tactics, using her enhanced mobility to come into close quarter combat and escape away quickly before retaliation. This is primarily used when with allies, however while alone, Puma will resort to using any measure to escape, especially when backed into a corner.

 

Power Descriptions: The only one of her powers that is more visual is her claws. Razor sharp and can be brought out without any delay, it is used as a last resort when facing opponents that too tough to be taken down by fists alone.

 

Complications:

Catholic- Carmen was brought up under strict Catholic upbringing, being a firm believer. This has resulted in conflict with her more feral self, believing it be a punishment of some sort of sin. She typically tries to attend service, keeping to the back of the congregation or generally out of sight.

 

Temper- Feral nature of her curse has pushed her to have a rather strong temper, easily getting frustrated when things do not go her way at times. Not a pillow in her dorm has been spared clawing, generally taking her anger out on them after classes or training, and in rare cases, on classmates during training. However, outburst like this is generally harmless, Puma taking great pride in controlling herself from hurting others.

 

Children- La Puma Negra will go to great lengths to protection children from harm, even putting her life in danger for them. This partially stems from her on personal contempt for herself and her unnatural form, wanting others to live a normal life which she cannot.

 

Short Attention Span- Due to the same feline curse that grants her powers, La Puma Negra is also affected by other instinctual traits. From a love of meat to a tendency for resting at high places, having fitted her bed to be a little bit taller.

 

Poor- Being an orphan and with no source of employment, Puma is a ward of the school, given only a small stipend from the school every month for her own purposes. Steadfast independent, the lack of money is a quiet shame.

 

Abilities: 2+4+4+2-2=10

Strength: 12/22 (+1/+6)
Dexterity: 14/30 (+2/+10)
Constitution: 14/26 (+2/+8)
Intelligence: 8 (-1)
Wisdom: 12 (+1)
Charisma: 10 (+0)

 

Combat: 6+12=18

Initiative: +14 (+10 Dex, +4 Imp. Init.)

Attack: +3 Base, +6 Melee (+3 Base, +3 Attack Focus [Melee])

Defense: +8 (+6 Base, +2 Dodge Focus), +3 Flat-footed

Grapple: +14 (+6 Str, +8 Attack Melee)

Knock back: -4 

 

 

Saving Throws: 2+5=7

Toughness: +8 (+8 Con)
Fortitude: +8 (+8 Con)
Reflex: +12 (+10 Dex, +2)
Will: +10 (+1 Wis, +5, +4 Enhanced Save)

 

 

Skills: 72R= 18pp

Acrobatics 5 (+15)

Climb 4 (+10)

Concentration 4 (+5)

Escape Artist 4 (+14)

Gather Information 4 (+4)

Handle Animal 8 (+8)

Intimidate 9 (+13 w. Enhanced Skills)

Language 1 Knows Spanish (Native) and English

Notice 0 (+1, +5 w. Enhanced Skills)

Search 5 (+4, +8 w. Enhanced Skills)

Sleight of Hand 2 (+12)

Sense Motive 5 (+6)

Stealth 6 (+16, +20 w. Enhanced Skills)

Survival 2 (+3)

Swim 4 (+10)

Notice 9 (+14)

 

 

Feats: 21pp

Acrobatic Bluff

Attack Focus Melee 3

Dodge Focus 2

Elusive Target

Evasion 2

Improved Crit 1 (Claws)

Improved Grapple

Improved Initiative 1

Improved Trip

Instant Up

Luck 1

Move-By-Action

Startle

Takedown Attack 2

Uncanny Dodge 1 (Hearing)

 

Powers: 1+12+16+4+10+4+3+5+15+6+1=77PP

All powers have the Magic descriptor unless otherwise noted

 

Additional Limb 1 (Tail; 1 Additional Limb, Feats: Improved Grapple) [1PP] 

 

Enhanced Constitution 12 (Beyond Human Stamina; +12 Con) [12PP]

 

Enhanced Dexterity 16 (Curse Born Advantage; +16 Dex) [16PP]

 

Enhanced Skills 4 (Predatory Enhancement; +4 Stealth, +4 Search, +4 Intimidate, +4 Notice) [4PP] 

 

Enhanced Strength 10 (Curse Born Power; +10 Str) [10PP]

 

Enhanced Will Save 4 (Will Save +4) [4PP]

 

Speed 3 (Feral Mobility) (50mph, 500ft/rnd) [3PP]

 

Strike 2 (Claws; Feats: Mighty, Split Attack, Accurate) [5PP] (Claws)

 

Super-Sense 15 (Feline Senses; Acute Scent, Acute Hearing, Darkvision, Extended Scent 1, Extended Hearing 1, Low-light Vision, Scent, Tracking (Scent) 1, Ultra Hearing, Ultravision) [15PP]

 

Super-Movement 3 (Hunter’s Mobility; Sure-footed 1, Wall Crawling 2 (Full Speed)) [6PP]

 

Telepathy 1 (Feline Communication; Limited to Emotions/ Felines) [1PP]

 

 

DC Block

Claws (Strike 2) Touch DC:23 (19-20 Crit) Toughness (Might; Split; Accurate) +8

Unarmed Attack Touch DC: 21 Toughness +6

 

 

Totals: Abilities (10) + Combat (18) + Saving Throws (7) + Skills (18) + Feats (20) + Powers (77) - Drawbacks (0) = 150/150 Power Points

 

Edited January 5, 2022 by MoonSimply
More fixes

[MoonSimply]

Already finding small things to fix here and there.

[RocketLord]

Notes from discord, so it's easier to find for you:

 

You should fix the formatting on the the crunch section, having everything in bold makes it more difficult to read. Just bold the power names and ranks.

 

Since her enhanced physical abilities (strength, dexterity, constitution) comes from her powers, I'd make at least some of them come from Enhanced [Insert Stat name] as powers. The cost is the same, but makes sense to have it like that, and generally speaking, any ability scores above 25 should be from Enhanced abilities anyway.

 

For your Combat scores, you should write out how you get those scores. Like, Initiative should be "Initiative +14 (+10 Dex, +4 Improved Initiative".

 

I'm not quite sure what you're doing with your skills. You can't take partial ranks in skills, like you have for Language and Sense Motive, and all of your of your total scores seem off.
Actually, I think I see what you did there. I think you've put the PP cost, rather than the Skill rank. You should just put it as skill ranks, so it should be:
Acrobatics 4 (+14)
Climb 4 (+10)
and so on.
And you don't need to note the Feats there, it's already listed under feats, but doesn't hurt to have it like that.

 

For your Feats, you need to list what sense Uncanny Dodge applies to.

 

For your Powers, you need to list the total cost, and you should use the formatting only the example sheet and you have to remember to add descriptions, like this for your Strike power:
Strike 2 (Claws; Feats: Mighty, Split Attack) [4PP] (Claws)
for the Telepathy power, you don't have to list the component powers like that, either buy each of them or just the combined Telepathy power.

 

A few misc things:
As it is atm, your Strike attack is at +8 to hit/rank 8 damage, which means there's no trade offs, so you should remove that trade off from the start of the sheet.

 

Since you seem to be making more of a melee than ranged attack, it's much more cost effective to buy most of your melee attack bonus as the feat Attack Focus [Melee] instead of buying it all as Base Attack. 3 ranks of Base Attack and 5 ranks of Attack Focus [Melee] gets you Melee Attack Bonus +8, at the cost of 11PP instead of 16.

 

You can do the same thing with Defense and the Dodge Focus feat, if you want to save some PP, just remember that at least 1/3rd of your total score must come from the Base Attack/Defense bonus.

 

Fluff wise... I like it. Inherited family curse is a pretty great power source that can lead to a lot of fun storylines.

 

I'd suggest aging her down to 16, though, since that way you get the full 3 years at Claremont, instead of just 1-1½, and as for Affiliations, Next Gen isn't really active site wise, NPC wise or otherwise, since all the old members of that group has long since graduated.

You could add some more Complications dealing with the curse, if you want, maybe some to do with the cat-like short attention span. I got a complication like this for one of my characters that could be used as a base.

Quote

To live will be an awfully big adventure: To Pan, a life without adventure would be worse than death. He searches for adventure in any form, always having trouble sitting still, be it during classes, stakeouts or strategy meetings. This can apply in many ways, such as picking up a strange idol, pressing the tempting button with "Do not press" or flying after something the glowing light in the sky, having trouble staying focused during planning on learning, which can cause problems later on, if Pan forgets crucial information or just didn't pay attention in the first place.

 

[MoonSimply]

Thanks, I've added and cleaned it up a lot more. Getting the hang of the shift from 3e to 2e.

[RocketLord]

No need to bold anything but power names and ranks

 

You still need to add descriptors to the rest of the powers. Since they all seem to have the same source, you could add a note under powers that read something like this:

Quote

All powers have the Magic descriptor until otherwise noted

And that should be fine.

 

For readability, you should put your powers in alphabetical order, just makes it quicker to read.

 

There's a few other things, but I'll fix that for you.

 

You actually had 21 feats, but... I'd suggest buying as many ranks in the Luck feat as you can (PL/3, round down, so 2). I've removed two feats that's unlikely to see much use (Improved Defense, Improved Block) to make room for that, since more HP is just really good to have and given you one rank of Luck instead.

 

I've split your Predatory Enhancement power into a few smaller powers

 

Here's an updated version of your crunch:

 

 

Abilities: 2+4+4+2-2=10

Strength: 12/22 (+1/+6)
Dexterity: 14/30 (+2/+10)
Constitution: 14/26 (+2/+8)
Intelligence: 8 (-1)
Wisdom: 12 (+1)
Charisma: 10 (+0)

 

Combat: 6+12=18

Initiative: +14 (+10 Dex, +4 Imp. Init.)

Attack: +3 Base, +6 Melee (+3 Base, +3 Attack Focus [Melee])

Defense: +8 (+6 Base, +2 Dodge Focus), +3 Flat-footed

Grapple: +14 (+6 Str, +8 Attack Melee)

Knock back: -4 

 

 

Saving Throws: 2+5=7

Toughness: +8 (+8 Con)
Fortitude: +8 (+8 Con)
Reflex: +12 (+10 Dex, +2)
Will: +10 (+1 Wis, +5, +4 Enhanced Save)

 

 

Skills: 72R= 18pp

Acrobatics 5 (+15)

Climb 4 (+10)

Concentration 4 (+5)

Escape Artist 4 (+14)

Gather Information 4 (+4)

Handle Animal 8 (+8)

Intimidate 9 (+13 w. Enhanced Skills)

Language 1 Knows Spanish (Native) and English

Notice 0 (+1, +5 w. Enhanced Skills)

Search 5 (+4, +8 w. Enhanced Skills)

Sleight of Hand 2 (+12)

Sense Motive 5 (+6)

Stealth 6 (+16, +20 w. Enhanced Skills)

Survival 2 (+3)

Swim 4 (+10)

Notice 9 (+14)

 

 

Feats: 21pp

Acrobatic Bluff

Attack Focus Melee 3

Dodge Focus 2

Elusive Target

Evasion 2

Improved Crit 1 (Claws)

Improved Grapple

Improved Initiative 1

Improved Trip

Instant Up

Luck 1

Move-By-Action

Startle

Takedown Attack 2

Uncanny Dodge 1 (Hearing)

 

Powers: 1+12+16+4+10+4+3+5+15+6+1=77PP

All powers have the Magic descriptor unless otherwise noted

 

Additional Limb 1 (Tail; 1 Additional Limb, Feats: Improved Grapple) [1PP] 

 

Enhanced Constitution 12 (Beyond Human Stamina; +12 Con) [12PP]

 

Enhanced Dexterity 16 (Curse Born Advantage; +16 Dex) [16PP]

 

Enhanced Skills 4 (Predatory Enhancement; +4 Stealth, +4 Search, +4 Intimidate, +4 Notice) [4PP] 

 

Enhanced Strength 10 (Curse Born Power; +10 Str) [10PP]

 

Enhanced Will Save 4 (Will Save +4) [4PP]

 

Speed 3 (Feral Mobility) (50mph, 500ft/rnd) [3PP]

 

Strike 2 (Claws; Feats: Mighty, Split Attack, Accurate) [5PP] (Claws)

 

Super-Sense 15 (Feline Senses; Acute Scent, Acute Hearing, Darkvision, Extended Scent 1, Extended Hearing 1, Low-light Vision, Scent, Tracking (Scent) 1, Ultra Hearing, Ultravision) [15PP]

 

Super-Movement 3 (Hunter’s Mobility; Sure-footed 1, Wall Crawling 2 (Full Speed)) [6PP]

 

Telepathy 1 (Feline Communication; Limited to Emotions/ Felines) [1PP]

 

 

DC Block

Claws (Strike 2) Touch DC:23 (19-20 Crit) Toughness (Might; Split; Accurate) +8

Unarmed Attack Touch DC: 21 Toughness +6

 

 

Totals: Abilities (10) + Combat (18) + Saving Throws (7) + Skills (18) + Feats (20) + Powers (77) - Drawbacks (0) = 150/150 Power Points

 

 

Edited January 4, 2022 by RocketLord

[MoonSimply]

Alright then, edited. Will go ahead offer this as my submission. Thank you so much for the help.