Three-Legged Race [IC]

[Cubist]

Pain and Jubatus were good buddies.

It had started only a calendar-week or two after he woke up with a 5 o'clock shadow that didn't know when to quit; occasional minor twinges, at first, in his lower back and hips. Jay Xavier was intellectually aware of what was happening and why -- knew that his insistence on bipedal posture was going to hurt -- but knowing was one thing, and doing was another thing entirely. Every time he'd considered going on all fours, it had been all too easy for him to come up with compelling reasons to think sure, it's gotta happen eventually, just not right this minute. So the twinges returned... again and again... and got progressively worse as the days stretched into weeks, and then months. Heck, even Jay's first outing as a superhero had been interrupted, at one point, by a spike of agony that had been just too intense for him to ignore...

Hindsight always being 20-20, it was pretty clear that the Point of No Return had been that little excursion to the Victorian alternate-timeline version of Earth. That was when Jay had stopped a runaway train all by himself, using four-point contact with the ground to maximize his braking power. He'd pushed himself to his uttermost limits, both muscle-wise and in terms of his Timeshift power, because nothing less would have done the job. And afterwards, the damn 'twinges' came more and more often, and stuck around for longer and longer periods each time -- and it wasn't more than a few calendar-days before Jay simply didn't have any pain-free moments. And now...

Now...

Jay Xavier was in an office. With a veterinarian. Because his never-to-be-sufficiently-damned physician had insisted that he consult someone who actually had the necessary degree of expertise in the care and handling of feline health problems.

Dorothy Malton looked at Jay. Being the senior vet on staff at the Hanover Zoo, Malton had already worked with her share of cheetahs -- but this was the first time she'd ever worked with a cheetah whose vocabulary was larger than hers! The... call him a 'client'? ... anyway, his being able to tell her where it hurt was a novel experience, and a good thing. As for the client's psychological quirks, which had resulted in his failure to follow "doctor's orders", with the inevitable consequences of that failure, those were not very good at all.

"Mr. Xavier..." she began, and paused at the look on his face. Even without her past experience interpreting the expressions of big cats, she'd have found this particular expression to be utterly obvious: He was terrified. Of what she was going to say. Maybe working with 'real' animals isn't such a bad deal after all, she thought. They don't invent rationalizations for doing stupid things, and even if they don't want to cooperate with their vet, you can darn well force them to do what they need to... She sighed.

"Mr. Xavier," she started, again. "The damage you've done to your spine thus far is treatable, particularly considering how quickly you heal, but if you continue to stand on your hind legs all the time, you will end up permanently crippled. The pain will get progressively worse, and eventually, you'll be physically incapable of achieving bipedal posture.

"So I'm prescribing strict adherence to quadrupedal posture. For the next seven calendar-days, I want you on all fours..."

[Cubist]

Jay Xavier was in the converted SUV he called 'home'. He'd spent the past few clock-hours in emotional shock, lying on the floor in what he refused to acknowledge was a stereotypically feline posture, and not thinking about much of anything at all. But his brain was (finally) rebooting after his encounter with that damned veterinarian, Malton...

Yeah, right. Damn me, he reproached himself. "Stupidity is the only universal capital crime"... Xavier sighed, a mildly alien sound coming from his inhuman throat. Enough malingering. Time to get back to work.

Xavier checked his calendar -- not that he actually needed to, as he knew very well what appointments he had, and when they were scheduled. This needless step was (if he was honest with himself) nothing more than a delaying tactic, something he was doing instead of actually dealing with those appointments.

Get on with it. If it's true and it sucks, acknowledging its truth won't make it suck worse.

And his very next appointment, the first one on his schedule after that damned veterinarian, was a client named Carlson Lefevrier. The man had designed a web application that wasn't operating according to spec, and he'd hired Xavier to figure out (a) what was wrong with it, and ( how to fix the problem. Lefevrier had demanded at least one face-to-face briefing per calendar-week on Xavier's progress -- and he'd been willing to pay for that privilege. And this briefing would be the first...

[Supercape]

GM

Carlson Lefevrier was a tallish man, just over six feet - perfect for looming over Jubatus. He had one of those slim but wiry frames that spoke of snake like strength. His hawkish black eyes and slicked back jet hair only added to his serpentine hair.

Carlson was probably in his forties, but had a complexion where one could not really tell. Years of high stress business had lined his face, but it was tanned and vibrant nonetheless.

Carlson was, in personality, more like a shark than a snake. He kind of had to be, running a multi - faceted financial services business. It was a cut-throat business, and Lefevrier financiers was no different - in fact, its relatively small size only made it more...

ruthless?

Still, Carlson was not a man without his uses, plenty of contacts in the financial world, some less legal than others. And his knowledge base intersected with Jay Xavier's. The relationship was not warm, but it was symbiotic. Carlson was not a bad man, just a businessman with a hard nose.

A nose that was not impressed with his clients posture.

A simple comversation by web-cam started, and indeed finished, abruptly - as was Carlson's nature.

"Get up, stop that act. I know there is a perfectly able brain inside that strange body - so pull yourself together and start acting professionally. Website has a glitch. I think its been hacked. Come over here, board meeting in an hour. And yes, normal...no...double normal pay for this. And a bonus if you get the swine who wrecked it. And don't even think of backing out or ill set my legal - hounds on your tail...make it snappy..."

And with that, Carlson signed off.

[Cubist]

Lefevrier was a jerkwad, but at least he was straightforward and honest. Jay Xavier was okay with that; if you had to deal with an jerkwad, better it be one who was upfront about their jerkwaddery, not a deceitful slime whose shiny-happy-friend façade got in the way of your recognizing their true jerkwad nature. Xavier would have preferred to have more than one hour's notice, but thanks to his Timeshift power, he could stretch that single clock-hour out to more than a day and a half of his time...

A few minutes of clock-time later, Xavier had completed his investigation into Lefevrier's problem. After thoroughly reviewing a number of sources of information, not least the website itself and the server logs, he reached a few conclusions (some of them more solid than others):

• [*:3vxf10bl]It was a hostile hack, not an innocent glitch.
  [*:3vxf10bl]Lefevrier's servers were more than adequately protected against external assault -- so the attack must have been an inside job. One of Lefevrier's employees, or someone who got illicit after-hours access to the physical hardware?
  [*:3vxf10bl]Xavier hadn't found any definitive evidence of who or what was behind the attack. However, Mobius Limited, one of Lefevrier Financiers' competitors, had motive (some sort of business conflict that Mobius came out on the short end of), opportunity (said conflict occured a few months ago), and means (Mobius was known to hire computer jocks with questionable ethics).
  [*:3vxf10bl]With regard to the actual person or persons who'd done the deed, again Xavier found no definitive evidence, but a Mobius employee named Jason Vines was clearly a candidate for any short list of suspects; Vines (a) had a degree in computer sciences, ( was a Mobius employee, and © had a two-year-old conviction for hacking on his record.

Fifty-some minutes left of the clock-hour deadline... and Xavier had been awake and alert for the few solid hours of his time he'd spent doing the necessary research. Most people wouldn't have cared; thanks to the bizarre sleep schedule which Xavier's accelerated (and inhuman...) body forced on him, he had to care, so now he caught up on his sleep. Since this involved a literal cat-nap, and he slept at his default tempo of 6 in the first place, he was fully refreshed in just a few more clock-minutes.

Fixing the website: Many of the necessary patches were already available for download, some others Xavier had to write himself. Fortunately, no glitches came up while he installed said patches. Thirty-something minutes left.

Next, Xavier collated his notes and condensed everything into an information-dense PowerPoint presentation, with a 25-page written summary that he printed out enough copies for every board member, Lefevrier definitely included. Eighteen minutes to go.

Between his laptop, the printed reports, and all the rest of it, Xavier would need to carry more stuff than he could comfortably manage with the quadrupedal posture he was confined to for the present. Obvious solution: A backpack. Its straps -- well, pretty much everything about it, really -- needed more adjustment than mere manipulation of buckles could accommodate; that was alright, as Xavier had already had to attack many other articles of clothing with needle and thread and scissors. And with only eleven minutes left before showtime, Xavier had what amounted to a cheetah-friendly set of saddlebags to carry everything in. He wasn't happy about it, but 'needs must when the devil drives', as the saying went.

With all his work done, and preparations for the meeting finished, Xavier zipped over to Lefevrier's office for the meeting. Only when he was at the front door did he downshift to the normal tempo of 1 and enter the building...

[Supercape]

GM

"Get up!" said Carlson as Jubatus crawled in. "This is a board meeting, for Christ sake! A board meeting... Jeeesus, how is it going to look if you present this hunched over like an animal?"

He snapped his fingers.

"This is business. Its image. Presentation. Pazzazz! Image is everything. And if you are huddled under the table, I have got no image, you understand? And the board here are like sharks. And I don't mean they eat fish and swim in the sea. They gobble you up alive if you show any weakness...."

He frowned. "And that includes you - don't think I take the rap for things going sideways if I can slide the blame onto somebody else. So get up and stand like a man or get yourself a good lawyer..."

[Cubist]

"Get up!" said Carlson as Jubatus crawled in. "This is a board meeting, for Christ sake! A board meeting... Jeeesus, how is it going to look if you present this hunched over like an animal?"

"Better than if I collapse in a heap with a cry of agony in the middle of a sentence," Jay Xavier replied. "I'm going quadrupedal on doctor's orders, not by whim, and definitely not by choice."

"This is business. Its image. Presentation. Pazzazz! Image is everything. And if you are huddled under the table, I have got no image, you understand? And the board here are like sharks. And I don't mean they eat fish and swim in the sea. They gobble you up alive if you show any weakness...."

He frowned. "And that includes you - don't think I take the rap for things going sideways if I can slide the blame onto somebody else. So get up and stand like a man or get yourself a good lawyer..."

The feline didn't give an inch. "Get stuffed, Lefevrier," he riposted. "One, do you want to make this a test case for the Americans With Disabilities Act?" Xavier wasn't sure if that particular piece of Federal legislation was actually applicable here, but if push came to shove, he was ready to spend however-many tens of thousands of dollars on the court case that would decide the matter. I don't want to go there, but if Lefevrier insists on forcing the issue... "Two, I won't be bipedal for a week. So you got two options: You can have a presentation from quadrupedal me, now, or you can have it from bipedal me, not less than a week from now. Your choice, but I don't know how your board's gonna like it if you go for the latter. And three, your board may be a school of sharks, but sharks are fish." Now Xavier grinned at Lefevrier, a rather discomfiting expression which give the financier a very clear view of his mouthful of sharp fangs. "And us cats eat fish."

[Supercape]

GM

"Get stuffed, Lefevrier,"

Lefevrier raised an eyebrow at the retort, but listened to the rest of Jubatus' reply.

"Damn federal legislation" he mumbled "you got balls, I give you that much" he added "coming at me like that with a legal knife at my throat".

He gave a slightly twisted smile.

"I could come back at you with an army of lawyers that would make you wish you had never been born. But hell, I appreciate your attitude. You are a shark yourself. You could make it in this business, kid. Just you remember" he added with a stern face "I am a bigger shark..."

He gave a cough as he presented Jubatus to the stern faced board of 4 women and 3 men, all dressed in grey-black hard-nosed business wear and typing into their own laptops.

"Forgive the unusual appearance of our troubleshooter here. But he does good work and does it well..." said Carlson, by way of introduction, before spinning around with both fingers aimed at Jubatus, full of sharp showmanship.

"Whaddyagot for us?" he japed.

[Cubist]

Jay Xavier nodded his acknowledgement (with a heartfelt internal sigh of relief) when Lefevrier chose not to force the issue of his posture. When the financier introduced Xavier to his board of directors, the feline leapt off the ground; upshifted in transit; and before he downshifted into a perfect four-point landing on the tabletop, he'd extracted the printed report-copies and his presentation from his saddlebags.

Making solid eye contact with each board-member in turn, the feline said, "Hello. My name's Jay Xavier, and I'm here because Mr. Lefevrier asked me to look into a website glitch." Another momentary upshift, and each board-member (Lefevrier included) had a copy of Xavier's report before them, and Xavier's PowerPoint presentation was up on the room's 105-inch HD display. The feline himself was on the table, laying down on his belly, facing the screen,

"Full details are in the written report, so I'll just give you the executive summary, and do feel free to ask questions about any issue you want to know more about. Now, the specific misbehavior that the website was exhibiting..." Xavier went on to describe the actual glitch, how he'd identified the real problem, and what he'd done to correct that problem. Since he wanted to make sure all of his listeners knew what he was talking about, Xavier started off at "informed member of the laity" level. He was prepared to adjust the difficulty level up or down as needed, depending on what level of comprehension the board-members displayed as the presentation continued...

[Supercape]

GM

"Full details are in the written report, so I'll just give you the executive summary, and do feel free to ask questions about any issue you want to know more about. Now, the specific misbehavior that the website was exhibiting..."

The board members attitude changed from mild hostility to slight respect. They were professional enough to know the bottom line - the business. What was good for the business was...good. And Jubatus' presentation, inhuman as his appearance and voice was, was proficient and slick.

And after all, this was Freedom City. World centre for odd.

"Go on..." said the nearest man. "The fine details we can pore over in your report. Whats the bottom line? recommendations?" he said, voice oozing crisp efficiency.

[Cubist]

"The fine details we can pore over in your report. What's the bottom line? Recommendations?" he said, voice oozing crisp efficiency.

"That's the final section in the report," Jay Xavier noted. "Based on the evidence at hand, the website glitch looks like it was perpetrated by an attacker who had physical access to your servers. It's unclear to me whether or not the attacker's physical access was legitimate, so I'd recommend that you both tighten up site security around the hardware, and upgrade your background checks on temps, consultants, and new hires. You may also want to take a second look at your existing employees, depending on how trustworthy you think they are to begin with. You'll need to decide how secure you want your systems to be, so I've worked up three different protocols: One is 'minimal common-sense precautions', the second is 'elevated caution', and third is 'rational paranoia'. Each protocol includes estimates of how much it would cost to implement, how much hassle it will put on your employees, and my best guess at how likely it is that an attacker can do one million dollars in damage if that protocol is followed. And one last thing..."

Xavier looked at each board member in turn. "Absolute security just isn't possible; all you can do is make it arbitrarily less likely that an attack will be successful. And one way to do this is to reduce the chance that someone else will even want to attack in the first place. So my final recommendation is that when Levefrier Financiers is deciding whether or not to adopt a particular course of action, the Board's criteria for acceptance must include the probability of that course of action resulting in an infuriated competitor choosing to resort to illegal assaults on Levefrier Financiers." The feline paused to let that sentence sink in, then concluded, "Thank you for your time and attention."

After that, Xavier re-packed his saddlebags in an upshifted half-second, and leapt gracefully off the table to pad out of the room...

[Supercape]

GM

So my final recommendation is that when Levefrier Financiers is deciding whether or not to adopt a particular course of action, the Board's criteria for acceptance must include the probability of that course of action resulting in an infuriated competitor choosing to resort to illegal assaults on Levefrier Financiers." The feline paused to let that sentence sink in, then concluded, "Thank you for your time and attention."

To a polite round of applause, Levefrier followed Jubatus out of the board room.

"Wait up!" he called, and tapped his foot.

"What do you mean by that last statement?" he asked. "A rotten apple in our company?" he demanded giving Jubatus a stare. "Never mind the fix - if we have a spy here, then we need to route out the culprit. Consider yourself hired for that, by the way..."

He gave a somewhat begrudged shrug. "Fact is, you are probably our best asset to sort it out. We can't employ anyone within the company to do this. And, yes, you did a good job back there..."

He looked at Jubatus expectantly.

"Standard rates of course..." he added.

[Cubist]

"Never mind the fix -- if we have a spy here, then we need to route out the culprit. Consider yourself hired for that, by the way... Fact is, you are probably our best asset to sort it out. We can't employ anyone within the company to do this. And, yes, you did a good job back there..."

He looked at Jubatus expectantly.

"Standard rates of course..." he added.

Of all the ways Lefevrier could have reacted to his presentation, 'let me hire you to finish the job' hadn't made Jay Xavier's short list. "Give me a couple seconds," he said, then sat down on his haunches for a couple of minutes of upshifted thinking. The man's a complete jerkwad! As best I can tell, he brought the attack upon himself. I should help him avoid the consequences of his own obnoxious actions? Then again, jerkwad or no, a crime was committed against him. Picking and choosing who I help, based on who I think 'deserves' my assistance... not such a good idea. Slippery slope, yada yada. On the gripping hand, the jerkwad needs a detective, and just how good am I in that field? Serve him right to pay my "standard rates" and I can't deliver...

In the end, after having compressed minutes of uninterrupted cogitation into seconds of clock-time, Xavier downshifted to the standard tempo of 1 to give the jerkwad his response: "Just to be sure you know, Lefevrier, I'm not a detective. Sure, I got some skills which might be useful, but a real detective can probably do what you want at least as good as me. Even so, you want to hire me to play detective, I'm game to try it. Standard contract with one exception: No penalties for failure to perform. I'll work my fuzzy tail off to solve the mystery, but this is not a task that's within my known range of expertise, so I absolutelycannot and will not offer my usual guarantees. And whatever I do or don't come up with, you will pay me. If those terms are acceptible to you, we got a deal; if not..." Here, Xavier shrugged, his shoulders describing an odd up-and-forward motion. "...I wish you luck in finding someone to nail the perpetrator for you."

Now it was Xavier's turn to supply an expectant look...

[Supercape]

GM

Lefevrier smiled, shurigging his shoulders whilst keeping his hands open and his eyes as dark as sharks.

"Of course!" he said, all honey and treacle "Standard fee's then. With a bonus for getting this sonovabitch, eh?" he dropped in, clearly wishing to give some incentive for success. "And you know, you will be in my good books, thats worth something too..." he said, frowning slightly at Jubatus.

"And as for a detective, well, I doubt some well heeled professional investigator, or chain smoking gumshoe is going to have the requisite skills to wade through all this high tech espionage as fast as you. So don't give yourself to much discredit. "

"Or to much, of course" he added as an after thought "I could get someone else. And somebody who looks more appropriate, you know, uses two legs rather than four. Not to good for your career breaks, that crawling, you know. "

[Cubist]

"Of course!" he said, all honey and treacle "Standard fee's then. With a bonus for getting this sonovabitch, eh?"

He actually accepted that deal!? Jay Xavier thought to himself. Wow. Either he's real desperate... or his apparent agreement is a scam, and he's gonna mess with the actual contract, maybe so's the "no penalty for failure to deliver" bit isn't there. The feline noted Lefevrier's remarks about 'career prospects' and getting on the jerkwad's good side and so on, filing them away for future reference.

"Fine -- I'll send you the contract, and as soon as I got a mutually-agreeable signed copy in my hands, I'll get cracking. Goodbye, Lefevrier." The moment he said 'goodbye', Xavier upshifted and made his exit; to merely human eyes, it would have appeared as if Xavier had simply teleported away.

It was one thing to be able to deal with a jerkwad like Lefevrier. To actually enjoy doing so... well, that was something else again.

---

Back in the converted SUV he called home, Jay Xavier pondered his next moves. As far as he was concerned, anybody who only pondered their next move -- singular -- was a slacker. Obviously, he'd have to work up a new version of his standard contract and have his lawyer check it for validity, after which he'd make two copies, one for him and one for Lefevrier, and collect signatures. Assuming the jerkwad had been honest with him, this shouldn't be a problem. Otherwise... Xavier shrugged; he'd firebomb that bridge if and when he came to it.

Apart from the contract for detective work, there was also his superheroing to consider. Even after running the gauntlet of making that presentation to Lefevrier's cronies, Xavier was still horrified by the thought of being quadrupedal when interacting with ordinary humans... but he now had hard evidence that the deed was doable. And (even better!) at least some humans, under some sets of conditions, weren't going to treat him like a goddamn animal, even if he was on all fours...

"You're afraid," his therapist, Ed Halstonne, had told him. "Afraid of losing your mind, afraid of losing control, afraid of someone getting hurt... or worse... because you misjudged your trajectory at multi-Mach speed. I won't say you're being irrational, because with your kind of power, it makes sense for you to be concerned. The question is, what are you going to do about your fear? When an animal is afraid, it tries to avoid the object of its fear; when a human being is afraid, other options are available. So are you going to let your fear control you? Or are you going to confront your fear, show it -- and show yourself -- that you are in charge of your own mind and life?"

Denial and avoidance: That's what had kept Xavier going so far. And why not? He was a cheetah. And running away, wasn't that what cheetahs did, what they were designed and built for?

Denial and avoidance...

It had to end. Somewhere, somewhen, Jay Xavier had to stop running from himself.

And now was as good (or lousy) a time as any.

A few minutes of swift, efficient activity later: Let's see, now. Modified contract for the jerkwad, check; emails of inquiry to people who know dubya-tee-eff they're doing when it comes to sound processing and/or artificial speech, check; anything else I oughtta take care of before going out on patrol..? An extended (upshifted) few seconds' pondering didn't bring to mind any issues that couldn't wait. Good enough. Time to see how the fastest hero on four legs does.

[Supercape]

GM

Meanwhile...

The giant beast sat back. He had monitored the entire meeting.

Once upon a time his name had been Jason Vimes. All round genius, all round whizz kid, all round nerd. When he happened upon a DNA sample of Dr. Simian, it had been a simple matter to organise his wishes. Mobius Ltd were a shady organisation, and he had hacked all their computers already. Manipulating one scientist after another, he had used them all to get his wish.

The power of Dr. Simian's genetic code. No more Jason Vimes, wimpy kid. No more bullying. No more jokes about his stature, or feeble physique.

Now, Jason Vimes was the Gorilla man!

He fingered his gun. A present from the various science institutes he had hacked into. A man of his intellect was able to understand it, but it had taken his paticular mechanations to get it made. It was, he knew, using very dangerous and unstable technology. But it served his purpose.

What he needed was Jubatus. To...examine. The Gorilla Man was going to use all the DNA he could get his hands on.

His giant ape fingers punched up some more computer screens. All was ready...

Back on the street....

A police car pulled up just by Jubatus. A lean, anxious cop wound down the window.

"Jubatus? I heard about you...thank God you are here! We have a robbery! The Hanover Insitute!"

[Cubist]

A police car pulled up just by Jubatus. A lean, anxious cop wound down the window.

"Jubatus? I heard about you...thank God you are here! We have a robbery! The Hanover Insitute!"

"Thanks. I'm on it," the feline replied—and before the final syllable reached the cop's ears, Jubatus had blurred on ahead, leaving only an afterimage on the officer's retinas.

As he ran, the fastest cat alive said, "Jeeves: Wake up. Jeeves: Status report, location H-I-T." Contrary to appearances, Jubatus was not talking to himself. Rather, he [bg=#00BF00]had poured a couple of Gadgets points into 'spiffy enhanced datalink with the FCPD'[/bg] was making use of a voice-activated system of his own design, basically a police-band scanner that digitized and collated all incoming reports in realtime. The only part of the system he carried on him was a radio transceiver; the actual working guts of the device were in a well-protected location elsewhere. The trickiest bit of putting this thing together had been making sure it would Just Work™ regardless of what tempo he happened to be running at, since his Timeshift played merry hell with radio signals… but in the end, that was just another technical problem, and solving technical problems was how Jay Xavier made his living.

"H-I-T. Presumed robbery," said a blatantly synthetic voice through a bone-conduction 'speaker' audible only to Jubatus. "Perps as yet unidentified. No data on perps' true objective. No data on number of perps. No data on exotic abilities."

Oh, joy, was Jube's disgruntled thought as he rocketed down 40th Avenue and across the Wading River. Flying blind sucks great green rocks with a Dixie straw. "Jeeves: Updates, keep me posted." A sharp left onto the Promenade, and the fastest cat alive was at the Hanover Institute of Technology. He zipped around the Institute's entire perimeter, then went inside, following a spiral trajectory that would give him a clear view of every square meter of the campus. Since the police do have a report on whoever-it-is, it's a good bet that they left some evidence of their progress…

[Supercape]

GM

Police cars were already at the scene when Jubatus arrived, although they did not register the feline blur that whipped past them.

It seemed the robbery was still in progress. A large truck was outside the institute, unmanned, with its doors open ready to receive the goods.

Inside, the building that was designated for Biotechnological research had clearly been broken into, its front doors smashed. And inside, the large central biohazard material room had been barred - presumably as a precaution, but through the reinforced glass, Jubatus could see four armed thugs hefting heavy machinery around, and a poor bound scientist tied up and shouting (soundlessly through the glass) for help.

As Jubatus ran around, scouting, he found the control centre for the biohazard chamber, a computer lock in place, sealing the doors airtight.

[Cubist]

Right: First things first, Jubatus thought after he circled around the target building. The feline spent a couple of clock-seconds disabling the truck; he unscrewed all the nuts which fastened all the truck's wheels to its axles, did the same for every spare tire he could find, and poured all the wheel-nuts into a vest-pocket; he slashed all the truck's tires, spare and otherwise; and finally, he opened up the hood and removed the engine's distributor cap. Having thus ensured that the truck wasn't going anywhere, Jube blurred inside the truck's cargo area… where he did not find any weapons, nor yet any other unpleasant surprises.

Then the fastest cat alive whipped around the building a second time, re-checking just in case somebody had teleported in while he was maiming the truck. Fortunately, nobody had done that. Okay, we got four roadies… one victim-slash-hostage… no supertypes in evidence as yet. Groovy. Jubatus pulled a half-inch-wide marking pen from his vest, and then scribbled on the reinforced glass where it would be plainly visible from anywhere on the other side, being careful to write the text mirror-reversed so the 'roadies' would be able to read it without any difficulty: YOUR TRUCK IS DEAD. WANT TO SURRENDER?

For an encore, Jube downshifted to a tempo of 1 and pounded on the glass to get the thugs' attention…

[Supercape]

(GM)

The fouren, dressed in black and wearing balaclavas, could hear the thumping. They stopped, read the sign, and looked at each other. One nodded, and they continued unperturbed, hauling some expensive looking machinery.

the scientist broke out in a smile when he saw superhero rescue seemed imminent, and nodded his head frantically to the men and their haul.

[Cubist]

Joyous friggin' day, Jubatus thought. Either they're only remodeling the place so they don't care if they can't move the goods to another locale, or they've got an alternate mode of transportation. Now, how do I get in there with the least amount of collateral damage..?

It went without saying that a technically-focused school H.I.T. would have a campus-wide internal computer network; Jube pulled an oversized palmtop and stylus from its vest pocket, and fired up a program of his own devising that would exhaustively try all legitimate modes of access and see what it could find. While that app did its work, the fastest cat alive zipped through the building in search of access points to the sealed-off region. He made frequent stops to downshift so he could examine the place in infrared wavelengths, as well as the ultraviolet range he saw in while upshifting.

The physical search was a bust; there simply weren't any other ways in than the obvious, and obviously sealed, doors Jube already knew about. My complements to the architects and/or engineers who designed the place. The cyber-search, however, yielded a valuable prize: The locks on the doors to the sealed-off region were computer-controlled—and the necessary access codes were stored on the system as plaintext, in an unencrypted file that resided in an unprotected directory! Even better, the building's realtime inventory system indicated that the sealed-off area didn't contain any active biohazards!

Jubatus grinned; his fangs made it a rather disquieting expression. He sent the necessary signals to unlock one door and re-lock it after he went through said door, then entered the sealed-off area. Once inside, he made an exhaustive search of the place. The hostage he'd seen was the only one he could find; likewise, there didn't seem to be any more henchmen than the the four he already knew about.

Jube prepped to send another set of lock-and-unlock signals, then downshifted to talk to the tied-up scientist as he freed the hostage from his bonds: "You know what these guys are after?"

[Supercape]

GM

The scientist looked straight at Jubatus and smiled.

"You" he replied evenly.

As he spoke, Jubatus could hear a hissing sound, and the locking of the biohazard door. A faint green gas started emitting from the machines the four men were holding.

"Bullseye!" said one, drawing a cosh.

"He pulled it off! He pulled it off!" said another, as all four men drew similar weapons.

The gas seemed to have no effect on the men, but Jubatus could feel his head becoming drowsy...

[Cubist]

The scientist looked straight at Jubatus and smiled.

"You" he replied evenly.

And in Jubatus' mind, a sentient crayfish intoned the words, It's a trap!

The solid k'chunk of a vault-like door—from the machinery the henchmen were holding, sibilant noises & discernable clouds of gas—Maximum upshift. Whatever these clowns're trying to sell me, I seriously doubt I want any. Jube tapped his hand-held computer with a stylus to send off the unlocking signals he'd already prepared. No, wait, tap there. Okay, got it. He sprinted for the door, fumbling in his vest for the gas mask. Not likely any gas weapon can take me out… 'specially not and leave the humans untouched… mask is good anyway, just in case. There was a quiet ringing in his ears that didn't seem like it came from any external source. Goddamn forepaws, of course they cramp up now—and while the cheetah's attention was focused on forcing his unruly limbs to obey his will, he slammed into a wall, directly beside his intended exit.

The impact didn't actually damage Jube; it just knocked the air from his lungs, and the gas mask from his hands. He leapt for the mask, which was moving through the air at a perceptible rate of speed, and undershot his target by a ludicrous margin. Who is this man… who is so wise in the ways… of cheetah biochemistry… Hitting the ground scrambled his coöordiation a little more—or was that the gas? Hard to say. The gas mask drifted away from him, floating as if in Lunar gravity, and Jubatus couldn't hardly move at all.

The henchmen approached Jubatus, their lazy steps absurdly slow. But even that languorous pace was sufficient, here and now, when he couldn't move and his vision was all blurry and getting worse by the second. The fallen hero managed to utter three words before darkness (and the henchmen) claimed him:

"Oh, [bg=black]xxxxixx[/bg] hell…"

[Supercape]

GM

Jubatus woke up an undetermined time later - it could have been minutes, hours, or days. Or even longer. His head felt very fuzzy and his eyes slightly blurred.

"Welcome" said a voice, with an extremely odd timbre and inflection.

Sitting in a magnificent leather chair was a giant Gorrila. Speaking, and even more amazingly, tapping away on a keyboard.

Jubatus could not move - he was strapped down to a bed with thick leather straps.

"No point in struggling..." explained Jason Vimes, sitting back and stopping his computer work. "I have calculated your precise level of strength, and designed these restraints accordingly. With room for error. There is no point in resisting!"

"Allow me to introduce myself. Jason Vimes, yes...I know, computer hacker extradonaire, and all around genius" he chuckled "and now, with enough physical power to match my brain" he said with gritted teeth and a clenched fist.

"And you, Sir, and an extraordinary feast of DNA. One I intend to gorge myself on!"

[Cubist]

I must be alive; dead people don't feel like this…

"Welcome", said a weird voice (distinctly less weird than his, the feline noted with annoyance). Jubatus upshifted.

Bleah… let's see if I can slip a forepaw or hindpaw out of the damn straps… no joy. Upshifted, my muscles generate the same amount of force, just compressed into a denser package, so… nope, the straps can take it. A little experimental squirming around proved to Jube's satisfaction that all of the straps were safely out of position to be sliced up by his built-in pointy bits. Great. Even if I had my vest, couldn't do a damn thing with it, or its contents. Okay, the gorilla's got a brain in his head. He returned to the normal tempo of 1, to hear whatever else the big ape might have to say.

"Allow me to introduce myself. Jason Vimes, yes... I know, computer hacker extraordinaire, and all around genius," he chuckled. "And now, with enough physical power to match my brain!" he said with gritted teeth and a clenched fist.

"And you, Sir, are an extraordinary feast of DNA. One I intend to gorge myself on!"

Jubatus was stunned. This guy wants my DNA? Given the evidence at hand, it's a decent bet he wants to Timeshift like me. Not good. But my DNA was tweaked by Grue, with genetic booby-traps so I can't be changed back to human. So if that's his game, he's playing Russian roulette! Maybe I can keep him monologuing until an opening reveals itself..?

"Hello, Vimes. You sure you want my DNA?" Jube asked. "I mean, you know my biochemistry well enough to work up a gas weapon which zaps me without affecting humans, so why bother with my genes, hrrm?"

[Supercape]

GM

I need the raw materials said Vimes, ominously, padding around Jubatus enjoying his success "Oh, I can guess at the principles. That was how I was able to device a nerve agent that affected only animals. Or, to be more precise, got somebody to design it, somebody to make it, and somebody to deliver it. And the best part is, they think it is all for legitimate purposes muahaha! You see, with my computer hacking expertise, I get scientists all over the world working for me - and they don't even know it!"

"Muahahaha!" he added, for effect.

"Now! wheel him away to the extraction chamber!" he said to two cronies, who dutifully wheeled Jubatus away on a bed, straps and all.

The extraction chamber looked like a medical bay, complete with various scanners and scary looking probes.

"Haw haw haw!" laughed one of the cronies as they wheeled him in and checked on the straps.

"Boss got you good, fool!" he mocked, his face close up to Jubatus.