Tsura Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 Looking for Feedback and advise on my character design. Or just positive comments, if you'd prefer. Name: Alias: Description: Age: Gender: Female Height: Weight: Eyes: Hair: History: Personality: Complications: Name: [Description] Abilities: 2 + 2 + 4 + 4 + 6 + 6 = 24PP Strength: 26 (+8)/12 (+1) Dexterity: 14 (+2) Constitution: 12 (+1) Intelligence: 14 (+2) Wisdom: 16 (+3) Charisma: 16 (+3) Combat: 4 + 4 = 8PP Initiative: +2 Attack: +4/+2 Melee, +4/+2 Ranged Grapple: +12/+22/+4 Defense: +6/+2 (+4/+2 Base, +2 Dodge Focus), +2/+1 Flat-Footed Knockback: -7/-12 Saving Throws: 7 + 1 + 5 = 13PP Toughness: +14 (+1) (+1 Con, +13) Fortitude: +8 (+1 Con, +7) Reflex: +9 (+2 Dex, +1,+6) Will: +8 (+3 Wis, +5) Skills: 52R = 13PP Bluff 8 (+11) Diplomacy 8 (+11) Computers 2 (+4/+16) Craft (Electronic) 7 (+9) Gather Information 2 (+5) Knowledge (Civics) 4 (+6) Knowledge (Current Events) 4 (+6) Knowledge (Technology) 6 (+8) Language (English, French, Spanish) Notice 4 (+7) Sense Motive 6 (+9) Feats: 5PP Benefit (Royalty, Diplomatic Immunity, Wealth 2) Connected Powers: 91PP Device 22 (110PP Container Flaws: Hard-To-Lose Feats: Restrictive 2, Subtle (Collapsible), Quick Change) [91PP] (Power Armor) Enhanced Strength 14 [14PP] (Mechanical Strength) Immunity (Life Support) [9PP] (Environmentally Sealed) Protection 13 [13PP] Feature( Disguises the Wearers Gender) [1PP] Enhanced Attributes (Enhanced Attack 2, Enhanced Defense 2, Dodge Focus 2, Enhanced Reflexes 6 ) [14PP] (Combat Assistance Software) Super Senses (Infravision , Radio, Extended Vision) [3PP] Weapon System ( 30pp Array Feats: Accurate 3, Alternate Power 2 ) [35PP] Base Power: Damage 10 Linked Drain Toughness 10 (Extras: Drain Affects Objects (+1) ) [30PP] (Plasma Blade) Alternate Power: Damage 10 (Extras: Ranged (+1), Autofire (+1)) [30PP] (Phased Pulse Gatling Laser) Alternate Power: Damage 10 (Extras: Ranged (+1), Shapeable (+1) ) [30PP] (Shoulder Mounted Volley of Micro Missiles) Adaptive Response Systems (13pp Array Feats: Dynamic Alternate Power 4 ) [21PP] Base Power: Impervious 10(Extras: Linked To Protection) [10PP] (Proprietary Reactive Armor Plating) Alternate Power: Flight 5 [10PP] (Plasma Thrust Propulsion) Alternate Power: Concealment(Normal Vision, Normal Hearing) Linked Concealment (Total Vision: Limited (Blending)) Feats: Close Range ) [9PP] Alternate Power : Power Lifting 10 [10PP] (Additional Power Directed to Mechanical Strength) Alternate Power : Datalink 5 Linked Enhanced Skill (Computer 12) [8PP] (Onboard AI assisted Electronic Interfacing) Drawbacks: (-4) = -4PP Normal Identity (Full Round Action To Don Suit Frequency: Common Intensity: Major) [-4PP] Totals: Abilities (24) + Combat (8) + Saving Throws (13) + Skills (13) + Feats (5) + Powers (91) - Drawbacks (4) = 150 Power Points
KnightDisciple Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 First: Awesome picture. It really pops out, but isn't too "busy", which is the perfect mix. Second: Probably best to take the stats out of quote boxes. Formatting looks better if you take the quotes off; you can spoiler-block any fluff stuff you're not messing with right now. Like this! Third: Formatting. Two things: how the powers are formatted, and how the Arrays are formatted. For reference on both, I'm going to be using my own character Gabriel, because he's got a huge freaking array (thus, an easily-spottable visual reference!) Power formatting should be: Base Power: Impervious Toughness 10 (Extras: Linked To Protection) [12PP] ("Proprietary Armor System") It's good to space things out a bit, and we always bold the power and rank, and italicize "extras", "feats", and so on attached to that power. You toss the fluff name for it at the end, for clarity's sake. As for the Array: Array Name (Things: Stuff) Base Power: Power Alternate Power: Power Alternate Power: Power Bam, another trick to make it clearer, and stand out more. To accomplish it, you write that first line, then wrap the rest in [*array*] [*/array*] (drop the *'s). Personally, I'm not sure the Power Loss drawback is really PP-worthy; seems more like a Complication to me. Also, you don't need to say "normal person without armor", that's implied in "normal identity". You need to note how many Ranks the Device has. Otherwise pretty solid.
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